The Moment in Longing

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To be falling so fast
To lose my advantage
To fall so sudden
I now feel blissfully damaged

Am I awake from sleeping for so long
Who am I when I look at my reflection
My heart, my womb feeling pierced
To give it away with no protection

I am sitting here looking down
But then I refused to cry
I am not some star-crossed girl
As to be sad, I should wonder why

I opened Pandora’s box after so long
To give what I had regained
I am ashes flaking away from the surface
Pieces of what no longer remains

Funny how you may say that I am happy
Bizarre how I disagree that I am not
It wouldn’t be me not to laugh, to smile
Especially when I there’s so much joy I forgot

Over a decade of ignoring where we left off
So that I could prove to the world I wasn’t crazy
And now that I have let myself go with you
My head, my world is so fucking hazy

The flood gates are opened
I do not want to drown in your trickery
I am moved, I am enamored, I am pleased
So much I fear going back to my misery

One little slip in my own righteousness
One sin that could last a lifetime
Should I regret it, never…
Because it is our own moment, divine

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