I intended on writing an article-type of blog for this particular story the day I received the news but I just didn’t have it in me to enter a bunch of facts that most of you could Google and probably have seen all over the internet by now. So figured I would do something different and speak from my heart because Earl Simmons or as the world knew him, DMX was known for just that very thing on each and every song. Even in interviews, the man spoke with pain, conviction and honesty. It didn’t matter if and when he may have been “under the influence of” or in fact what… Everything he said was spoken with a type of energy unmatched by any other performer I knew or had seen. From his raspy voice to his signature growl or bark, the man was at the very least charismatic. His energy could be felt no matter where you were in the audience. Trust and believe you were guaranteed to sweat out whatever hairstyle you had.
Like many, I’m a fan of DMX always have been. In fact I’ve probably seen him more times in concert than any other musician… ever. There’s not a album I don’t own that he’s made. I’ve pretty much have seen him and TV interviews movies you name it yep I’m a fan. But what separates him from any other famous person is that (and I hate to use his word) but I kind of idolized him. Even as a kid, I couldn’t count the times I was yelled at for blasting his songs from my room. So fan was probably an understatement. For one, I actually met the man. Yes, I actually got the opportunity to carve a little bit of his time to not only do fan stuff and take photos but I had a moment to actually to tell him about a little about myself. It was that moment that was the most awesome experience ever why because this guy is so humble and for that I was eternally grateful.
Despite his humility and all-around dopeness, DMX was a man troubled and plagued by his own demons, the same type of demons many of us have but aren’t on the display for the entire world to see. However it was the way that he charismatically talked about these demons that drew us to him. It was his pain and immense way with lyricism that made us love him more despite knowing how awful those demons were. It’s not too many musicians, actors or famous people that can make me shed a tear or feel emotional about their passing. Yeah I can feel remorse or a bit of empathetic sadness because no matter how much I don’t know them, I can’t help but feel sorry for their loved ones. Nonetheless, I’m not emotionally invested or attached to them. I don’t even feel the urge to cry no matter how much I like them as a performer or entertainer. But that whole Friday I felt heavy and very few famous people have made me feel this way. I mean look how long it took me to produce this blog. From the moment I got word that he was in the hospital, I felt a heaviness on me, you would have thought it was an actual relative passing. I was heartbroken and pleading for his recovery, albeit knowing it wasn’t likely especially as the days went by and there was no change in his vitals. I prepared for the worse and prayed for the best.
But maybe this was for the best. The concept of death is so vastly different in its interpretations in many cultures but one thig for certain is that it is inevitable and often times it is the ultimate rest for whatever we cannot escape while here. Sometimes death is the only release for our demons and I am not talking the mythological creatures that are red with horns or something else out of TV/movies. I am talking about those demons that we don’t necessarily see or that are corporeal in nature, instead it is those such as addiction or even The 7 Deadly Sins as depicted in Christianity:
But I copied the best way I knew how… By blasting X while killing a workout and later taking a drive. But aside from that, so I decided to say a few words, a poem If you will…
Despite your troubles, you never turned down the chance to give charity. You prayed for us after shows, signed autographs and took pics. And even if you were exhausted, you were the famous one who made fans feel appreciated.
Despite your demons you carried angels on your back, surviving what most could never. But now it is time for those angels to carry you into the hereafter.
Despite it may be dark now, and yes we’ve been told Hell is hot. But I fear not that is where you’ll end up going. So say hi to those you lost along the way, including your grandma, your pup Boomer and those lost in the struggles of their day.
So despite your flaws and mistakes, and despite continuing the things that inevitably sealed your fate, you showed us how to love in a world of hate.
You used energy to turn your own agony into a place of solace for many, your words were more than pain… The were poetry.
What we saw was what we would get, you told us that we wouldn’t like it all… But there was more to love in you than it was to hate. Your demons can no longer possess your mind in this space.
So we will mourn you for now but when we hear your songs or that infamous growl… smiles will emerge from tears. And hope now found where there was once fear.
Rest easy, X.
Until Next time kiddies,
Be Awesome, Be You, But Above All Else… Love Yourself
Follow the Drunken Insomniac Writer on:
Podcast: The Single Chronicles Podcast
Facebook: R.S. Lewis aka Insomniac Writer
Tumblr: Home of the Drunken Insomniac Writer