Before I begin… Let me define fully a sociopath:
A sociopath has no remorse or guilt for hurting others. They are manipulative, impulsive, dishonest but very charming, charismatic, well-liked & have a false sense of entitlement. They are narcissistic & unrealistic or unmerited expectations in life. In some cases they are well educated, which is why despite knowing their actions are a detriment will still hurt others because they some can’t help themselves nor do they have a regard for rules/morals/laws.
They may show signs of rage when confronted but don’t be deceived by this reaction. It is not always anger… It is because they have issues dealing with reality. They may apologize but are not apologetic. They are not necessarily evil people or bad but a sociopath does not possess the ability to learn from their behavior & in fact may blame others for what they do. You cannot fault yourself…it is just what/how they are. It is a personality disorder that unfortunately love…even faith alone may not always cure.
After living with & loving a sociopath… I realized that there was nothing I could do to prevent the inevitable.
They are the type to contract a STD & instead of treating it or spreading it, they will continue to have unprotected sex. You can beg, cry & plead for them to change but unless they not only acknowledge their problem, it will never end.
Despite my pleas of my pain that this person caused me as well as to others, he did nothing & most times seemed more aggravated that I fussed & cried about it. It took me a long time to realize everything in my power was ending in the same result & I was going if not already gone insane. No matter the damage caused, things continued up & down. Even before I had came along, the madness ensued…there was no thought or even concern of the consequences or reactions that followed.the sexual deviance.
I decided to hit my therapy (blog).
My intent wasn’t to oust anyone or put personal business out there but to shed light on a issue that plagues especially the black American community. Why? Because we are the last to seek a psychiatrist or therapy. It’s like mental disorders are a “white person’s disease” & we keep issues like this a secret. Well I went on a mission to expose it.
Despite help being available/offered not to mention intervention from family/friends, this person refused to seek professional help from both the emotional & physical distress that they had caused. I watched them turn a cold shoulder & even become enraged at not only my tears but that of his own mother. It was like my anger/hurt was an inconvenience to them.
Moving along, I know there are people dealing with this disorder but like that of an untreated STD, they continued their behavior. It was a path of destruction I had to finally escape. I tried to help but I only was damaging myself in the process.
Like Dexter, the fictional character from TV & books, a sociopath can somehow learn to manage, maybe even tame, if not live with their behavior.
It can be by redirecting it or something. They can be productive members of society & maintain relationships but it has to be because they want to or feel the need to. Are they bad people ? No! Are they incapable of loving or being loved? No! They just have to have that need to do so.
They need & must want to see the connection that in a different way normal people do. Because they lack a moral code… It takes a long time to cope with someone like this often because they hide their issues from the surface. Confrontation & healing must be done really early mostly in childhood but because most of us see every mental disorder as something else like them “acting out or acting up”.
Ass-whoopings won’t even cut it. Drugs may not even help… It takes special care to stop the unwanted behavior such as redirecting their behavior to something at the very least productive.
I’m no psychologist but I know that we as a people need to stop the nonsense of not getting professional help. We need to stop enabling the behavior & face it head on.
Well Until Next Time Kiddies…
Shalom
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